Sydney Counselling, Relationship Counselling, Sex Therapy

Performance Anxiety

Performance anxiety is the fear of failing to perform sexually in some expected way that satisfies our partner sexually. This can lead to feelings of shame, rejection, and low self-esteem and worry that the same will happen again. This in turn may lead to avoidance of sex fearing repeated failure that does little to address the issue.

How does this start? There is no one answer for this. Perhaps the man could not maintain an erection after a night of consuming alcohol and then bragging about how good a lover he is and then failing in the bedroom. Perhaps his partner did not want sex and was unresponsive to his approaches and he thought he was “getting it wrong” bruising his ego and self-esteem. Perhaps premature ejaculation ended his sexual interest leading to his partner not being satisfied.

Treatment for Performance Anxiety can involve pharmacological interventions, behavioural therapy, NLP, cognitive behaviour therapy and even psychotherapy depending upon the cause of the anxiety.